Even if you want it, change is full of self-doubt and second-guessing. It doesn’t have to be.
After coaching hundreds of women through career, relationship, health, and financial shifts, I have seen 5 key components emerge.
The time and energy it takes to navigate change is exhausting. Change challenges the status quo. Our brains are wired to be alert for threats, and change threatens the security of what is in exchange for what could be.
Trust Yourself
Trust that you do know what’s best for you.
When you rely on external sources to tell you what’s right or wrong for you, there is a strong signal that you can’t trust yourself. Talking over a significant change with a spouse or trusted friend can offer some needed insight. Polling everyone you know, checking social media, or following what everyone else is doing doesn’t consider your wants and needs. It gives your power away.
Know Your Core Values
Your values are your north star. Let them guide your decisions.
The difference between someone who sorta kinda knows their core values and someone who can easily state them is like night and day. If you don’t have a north star, you end up stumbling around in the dark. If you know one of your core values is autonomy, and the job you’re considering is highly structured with little room for autonomy it’s clearly not a great fit.
Tune in to Your Body
Your body holds wisdom if you tune in and listen.
How is your body reacting? Do you have tension, aches and pains, insomnia, or gastric upset? Tune in to your unique body cues. I get a very tense jaw and an ache at the base of my skull when I’m not paying attention to the details. Take time to notice yours.
Create a Future Self
Having a vision of where you’re headed helps you recognize if something aligns with where you’re going.
I have clients write a letter to themselves from 5 years in the future outlining what they have accomplished and what a typical day looks like. This consciously sets the energetic blueprint and alerts your brain to look for opportunities that are aligned with where you want to go. It’s easy to adjust if you want to create something new.
Cost/Benefit Analysis
Using some form of a pro/con list helps to clarify what you want.
The 2 things that often get overlooked on these lists is the feeling state and the state of being. If you are looking at moving to a new location, consider how you think this move will make you feel and how you think you’ll show up differently. You might discover that you don’t need to move to obtain what you desire.
Taming Self-Doubt Eases the Discomfort of Change
Applying these 5 concepts makes the decisions around change, big and small easier and smoother. They also help improve communication, clarity, and overall happiness.