According to Wikipedia happiness is a mental or emotional state of well-being defined by positive or pleasant emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy. The circumstances of it are different for everyone but the core of it remains. It’s often thought of as a destination yet it’s more a state of being.
It’s an interesting thing this pursuit of happiness. For many as they are searching it’s not named directly but there it is beneath the surface of the new shoes, the dream job, the relationship, or the great vacation. The idea that ‘I’ll be happy when…fill in the blank” is pervasive.
If you really think about it, pretty much everything we do is because we think we’ll feel better in the having or doing of it. The having or achieving though is short-lived and it’s on to the next thing. In my coaching and teaching, I hear people talk about happiness a lot.
What strikes me is so often the almost whisper that they want to be happier as if it were a frivolous or unworthy desire. I’ll save the myriad of health, well-being, and financial benefits of happiness for another post but in a nutshell, happiness is a very worthy pursuit that not only helps you feel better but impacts health and earning power as well.
The idea that stress, struggle, and discontent is just the way life is, is a mindset that can, and I believe should be shifted. I have a core belief that when someone is happy i.e. feels connected, has meaning and purpose, experiences flow, accomplishment, and positive emotion they are better equipped to contribute their unique gifts in this world, it’s a win-win.
Happiness is a state of being. It’s not slippery or out of reach or insignificant. It is at its core vibrational. It affects all aspects of your life. And you get to choose it. It’s not about being in a continual state of joy. Happiness includes feeling all of your emotions without being consumed by them. If you’ve been feeling stuck or frustrated with your current situation boosting your happy may help you to shift out of it in unexpected ways.
There are little things every day that have a huge impact on your happiness. They’re the things we often overlook, moments of appreciation, gratitude and kindness. Many people think you’re either a pessimist or an optimist end of the story.
Not true, your happiness consists of the following three segments:
- Your Set Point, 50% – genetically/society determined happiness level.
- Intentional Activities You Engage in, 40% – how you act, your thoughts, and the goals you set for yourself.
- Your Circumstances, 10% – Your life circumstances or situations – things like health, finances, and relationships.
You can have the most impact on the intentional activity segment. Doing things like practicing gratitude, looking for the positive, eating healthy and exercise all boost your happy. That 40% has a big impact on your life satisfaction and happiness level.
There is research showing that you can impact your set point directly by engaging in acts of kindness towards others. The theory is that helping someone else increases your self-esteem, which boosts your happiness set point. This boost does not occur if you’re helping someone out of obligation rather than kindness.
Try a little experiment this week, look for opportunities to practice random acts of kindness (include yourself too!) Things that would make you smile if someone did them for you are always a good place to start. Try for at least one random act of kindness a day and see how you feel at the end of a week. And the truth is that the world could use a little extra kindness right now.
I would love to hear what random acts of kindness you came up with! Share what you did in the comments or shoot me an email.
Namaste’,
Be Well,
Cathy
