Hi Reader,
I was enjoying a cup of tea and the latest episode of The Amazing Race on Sunday night when a smooth something rolled across my tongue. I spit it into my hand and identified my right rear crown. After a valiant effort to reseat it, I gave up. My dentist couldn’t see me until Tuesday….soooo much time to fret.
I’m very anxious about dental work. It has gotten significantly worse after a lengthy and painful tooth extraction several years ago. As I waited for my appointment, I took the opportunity to work with a new technique, narrative inquiry, that I have been using with clients.
The technique is relatively straightforward. Take the problem or issue and tell the story of it, write it out, or speak it into a notes app for transcription in fifteen minutes or less.
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This gets to the story that you are telling yourself. It highlights the beliefs you have.
In my case I told the story of my fear of dental care.
Let the story sit for at least an hour or two, even overnight, as long as you remember to come back to it.
This gives you a little distance from the experience.
Next, read the story from a third-person perspective. Some of my clients have even given the third person a name.
This helps to shift perspective and highlight beliefs that may or may not serve you.
Part of my dentist example: I’ve had a really bad dental experience. I was in severe pain, and the dentist didn’t seem to care. I had no choice but to stay and finish the extraction, and then it got infected.
She had a really bad dental experience. She was in severe pain, and the dentist didn’t seem to care. She had no choice but to stay and finish the extraction, and then it got infected.
Mia had a really bad dental experience. Mia was in severe pain, and the dentist didn’t seem to care. Mia had no choice but to stay and finish the extraction, and then it got infected.
Notice what pops up Curiosity? Empathy? Solutions?
What I noticed was my feeling of helplessness no control over the situation or outcome.
Is there a way to shift the story even a little bit?
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I reminded myself that things always work out for me, and my current dentist is really great at making sure I’m comfortable.
On Tuesday morning, I was nervous but not quaking in my boots, and the crown was cemented back in place in about 15 minutes.
For the Conversations with a Healer subscribers, watch for a more detailed breakdown of the process in your inbox.
Is there something you might like to try this on? Hit reply and let me know
Be Well,
Cathy
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