I’m not sure about you but I can get BSO (bright shiny object syndrome) or FOMO (fear of missing out) and make bad choices. Ones that aren’t based on my goals and dreams but on the other persons ability to persuade me. This is particularly true when I’m not clear about what it is I’m wanting to create. Often, we get so caught up in the day to day stuff that we don’t take the time to slow down and connect with our desires to see what we want to create in our lives.
These 6 questions help me when I feel like I’m getting sidetracked with BSO or FOMO.
- What is my primary focus right now? By identifying what is most important to you in this season you can cut through the seductive swirl of the program, class, or product you’re thinking of buying or spending time on.
- Does this ‘thing’ hurt or help me given my primary focus? This can help identify the support or distraction that the ‘thing’ offers. While a shiny new pair of shoes feels good in the moment does it support your focus of building your savings account? Does the new class support your focus on building community and having fun activities or is it a distraction from that?
- What do I need to let go of to make room for the BSO? When adding something new into the mix it means there has to be space for it. That might be space in your schedule to complete assignments, space in the closet for the new shoes, or space in the budget to purchase. Are you willing to give up your weekly date with your friends? Will you re-home a pair of shoes in your closet? Are you okay with giving up lunches out to save money? The willingness to make room for something is a key indicator.
- What will I gain from this BSO? Looking at your focus how does this ‘thing’ move the needle with your focus. A new job could help you increase cash flow, increase meaning and purpose, learn a new skill or hone an existing one. A class might increase your life satisfaction, further your career, or expand your social circle. Identifying what you’re gaining helps filter out the FOMO.
- How does it feel energetically? Close your eyes and just feel what the BSO holds for you energetically. You can also muscle test this (see previous blog post). Try not to think into this just let yourself tune in energetically – if you’re new to this it’s okay to test it out and lean on the other questions for confirmation.
- What does your intuition say? Often times our gut is saying “back away from the BSO” and we try hard to ignore it because we don’t want to miss out or we’re getting a “hell yes go for it” but we’re afraid to go for it. Quiet your mind and pay attention to your body cues – the butterflies, tense neck, etc.
Life is full of uncertainty. Questioning every decision or having buyer’s remorse is exhausting. Learning to tune in to the subtle cues from your intuition and being aware of the season your currently in helps to free up some of that energy for other things.